LGBTQ+ Wedding Planning Tips, Ideas, and Advice for Your Perfect Wedding
Starting to plan your dream LGBTQ+ wedding to marry the love of your life? Securing a venue. Choosing a caterer. Finding a professional wedding photographer. Deciding on your ceremony decor and reception vibes. These are all standard wedding planning tasks. The real fun begins when you dive into LGBTQ+ wedding ideas to add personalization to your celebration. Whether you want a gender-neutral wedding party or LGBTQ+ wedding readings, there are tons of fun and special ways to create the wedding of your dreams that accurately represents your love story. Follow these tips for planning the perfect LGBTQ+ wedding.
How to Plan Your Perfect LGBTQ+ Wedding
Mountainside Events is a woman and LGBTQ+-owned wedding planning company in Colorado. We are passionate about helping same-sex couples celebrate their love authentically, and that starts with finding creative ways to bring your dream wedding to life. Keep reading for our five best LGBTQ+ wedding ideas and tips for designing an inclusive event
1. Choose Inclusive Terminology
Making your same-sex wedding language inclusive is an important part of personalizing your special day. Many words and terms you hear at a wedding are non-inclusive, such as “bride and groom” and “husband and wife.” If these labels don’t work for you, change them.
Here are some gender-neutral marriage terms to use instead:
Change “bride and groom” to “bride and bride,” “groom and groom,” or more gender-neutral marriage terms such as “partners,” “spouses to be, “life partners,” or even just your first names.
Change “husband and wife” to “husband and husband,” “wife and wife,” or to gender-neutral marriage terms general terms such as “spouses” or “soul mates.”
Change “You may now kiss the bride” to something more inclusive, such as “You may now kiss!” or “I invite you to seal your marriage vows with a kiss.”
Change “I now present to you Mr. and Mrs. Smith….” to however you want to be introduced as a married couple. You can be introduced by your first and last names if one person is not taking the other’s last name. You can be introduced by your first names only. Or present yourselves as a married couple, not using any names at all! “I now present to you the newlyweds!” works perfectly for your LGBTQ+ wedding.
The most important thing is to clearly communicate your preferred pronouns and desired terminology with your wedding officiant and anyone else who may give a speech at the wedding. Additionally, be sure to carefully choose any LGBTQ+ wedding readings or songs for the ceremony or reception to ensure they speak to your love story and the inclusivity of your marriage. This way, the entire wedding feels as natural and welcoming as possible for both you and your guests.
2. Incorporate Pride
Rainbow colors symbolize pride, and there are many ways you can subtly or overtly use the pride colors in your wedding design.
Here are some LGBTQ+ wedding ideas to infuse pride:
Wear rainbow-colored cuff links or suspenders
Wear rainbow-colored shoes
Wear rainbow-colored socks
Have your wedding party wear outfits in the pride colors
Incorporate pride colors into your wedding bouquet
Incorporate lines from the Supreme Court ruling for same-sex marriage into your wedding design, speeches, or LGBTQ+ wedding readings
Decorate with gender-inclusive signage
Serve a rainbow wedding cake or other desserts
Celebrate with rainbow-colored smoke bombs set off at the end of the night (makes a pretty awesome photo-opt!)
3. De-Gender Your Wedding Party
While there are many “gendered” aspects of a traditional wedding you can change for your perfect LGBTQ+ wedding, one of the main ones is your wedding party. The idea that a bride only has female friends or vice versa is somewhat silly, even for a heterosexual wedding. However, for a same-sex marriage, it’s important to keep your wedding party gender-neutral for all of your friends who will stand next to you.
Here are ideas for a gender-neutral wedding party:
Call it a “wedding party” rather than labeling your friends as “bridesmaids” or “groomsmen.”
Break all gender-specific rules and roles and have your friends stand wherever you want, regardless of how they identify.
Choose inclusive wedding attire for your wedding party to wear. If you like the idea of your wedding party matching in one way or another (color, style of attire, etc.), you can do that but don’t feel obligated to choose traditional bridesmaid dresses or tuxes if it doesn’t fit the style of your wedding.
4. Wear What You Want
It’s your wedding. Wear what you want. If that means you both wear floor-length bridal gowns or both wear tuxedos, or one wears one, and one wears the other, choose wedding attire that fits your relationship dynamics. Some tips for finding the perfect attire for your LGBTQ+ wedding:
For those who want to wear a tux, check the boy’s section if you’re petite in size. And for those wearing dresses, visit a local dress shop and talk to them about your needs to see how they can work with you to find the perfect dress that makes you feel exactly how you want on your wedding day.
5. Break All the Traditions (And Make Some New Ones)
When it comes to any gendered wedding tradition, break it. Seriously, don’t feel obligated to adhere to any tradition that doesn’t work within the structure of your relationship.
Do both brides want to walk down the aisle? Perfect! Have one go first and then the other. Or, create two aisles so both brides can walk down at the same time. Talk about an epic first look!
If the tradition of “transferral of ownership” from father to husband doesn’t sit well with you, reinvent it. Whether a family member walks you down the aisle or you ask another important person in your life, the gesture doesn’t have to be one of “giving away” but rather showing support for the marriage. If you want to break this tradition altogether, walk yourself down the aisle!
If traditional wedding vows don’t speak to your love story or the commitment you are making to one another, write your own LGBTQ+ wedding vows!
Adapt traditional “Mr. & Mrs.” wedding elements to match you as a couple, such as “Mr. and Mr.” chairs or a same-sex wedding cake topper.
Plan Your Perfect LGBTQ+ Wedding with Mountainside Events
At Mountainside Events, we know how to make your wedding accurately represent your love story. Together, we can break all of the gendered traditions and design the perfect wedding ceremony and reception for you. For more LGBTQ+ wedding inspiration, check out this blog post which features photos from when Taylor proposed to her now fiancé! Then, contact us today so we can help you plan the LGBTQ+ wedding of your dreams!